---apple addict---

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Acceptance and patience

So this is a new chapter of my life. New blood, new journey, no strings attached, happier.

I did 8 cycles of chemotherapy and right after I did not have the right preparation of my heart to allow a slow progress for my health. All things were done in a rush, because of a certain expectation, wanting to be well for certain people, wanting to be back in normal life so bad to walk the path everyone is expected to take.

Then it struck me again. Relapse.

It was until I made a major turn in my life that I realised that I wasn't treating myself right. I wanted to follow a certain expectation, a certain path. It was until that major turn that I finally feel so free. No strings attached. Now I am just focused on getting well. I can take all the time that I want. I don't have to worry about getting ugly or fat, I just need to give myself time and love myself more.

I keep telling people, the thing I need now is to be patient with my recovery. That is acceptance of your situation and circumstance. I tell myself, think about the worst situation, maybe 5-6 months of uncertainties, frequent doctor's visit, I still have to be patient. Glad that I don't have any schedule to follow. Having this mindset is very liberating.

I wish someone could have told me earlier about what to expect after chemo. Then perhaps I would have the right preparation of my heart. Everyone seems to wish every sick person "get well soon". Yet we forget the importance of getting well patiently.

All in all, thank You God for liberating me and preserving me, though I was impatient and I was disillusioned and ungrateful. Yet you opened my eyes and showed me Your grace and amazing ways!

Too all who are recovering from cancer, stay positive and stay patient!

by apple-addict at 9:51 AM |