Hi. I am appleaddict. Loved by my Maker. Valued by Him more than I know. I am the apple of His eyes. So are you! :) I thank Him for creating me and giving me chance living on this Earth, be who I am. With His love, I will treasure life and live to make a difference before I leave this place, to finally see my Maker.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
not serving God, but loving God
I came back last week... Thought it can be a nice break from everything.... Well sometimes serving alot in Church makes me think that I am losing out alot of things.. But when I really think about it again. I've gained so much more.
Last Sunday, when I went to church with family for the first time in a long long time.. The sermon preached was about the prodigal son. One thing that struck me the most is when the preacher began to teach about moving on from being a servant, to being a son.
When the prodigal son came back to the Father, he requested that his father made him like one of the servants in the house. However, that wasn't the father's intention. In the mind of this prodigal son, he is thinking, I have sinned sooo much against my father, I want to be a servant in my father's house to earn for myself selfworth, or perhaps earn his father's love.
However, the father wanted to restore his son's identity. His father wanted to let him know that he does not want his son to serve him, he wants first and foremost for his son to love him.
Then I was reminded. Sometimes we use the word serving God alot in Church. It makes it sounds like an obligation. But when we change the word to loving God, our whole perspective changes. From growing tired of serving to being re-charged to love God through our service.
May we always be reminded that the true reason for serving in Church is not to gain the Father's love. It's not for being accepted in His house. But let our love for God be the driving force for us to serve in the house of the Lord.
Have been slacking for quite a while. Firstly because the school I'm working in started exam really early and they had 1 week of exam break. Which means, I had nothing to do, till all the exam scripts come in. I had to mark only one question, so it also mean that I could finish quite fast. Marking really opens my eyes. Amazing mistakes students can make!!! Despite being taught and nagged over and over again. Perhaps they have too many subjects to study, and some are just not as consistent and focused as the rest.
Then after that the heart-pain of seeing the total mark for the students! Oh well. What to do? Part and parcel of a student's life.
After exams, I had only a few weeks of classes left, which was interrupted by some post exam activities. :( Then my poor students have to come back during holidays. And do assignment during holidays. Poor Singapore students! What to do? TL. That's life.
On my last day of lesson, I collected some feedback from students. I had specifically asked them to give me their most honest feedback, so that I can improve on my teaching. Indeed I had some good feedback. Now I have a goal in mind. How do I become the best teacher I can be? So that I can deliver the best lesson, and at the same time connect with them? Sounds too ideal? But this is my goal at the moment. Be the best I can be.
I'm going to training next year. So I hope I can have a good time there. Although I've heard about the crazy deadlines. I have also some teachers telling me that it can be enjoyable if I know how to utilize my time. Which also makes me realize. I should start to think about how I should re-focus. What are the excess in my life? What are the excess baggage? I cannot carry them if I wanna focus.
I need to do the things I'm called to do, for the moment. Not everything. Right?
If only more people would join the force to ease the burden of the body. U know what I mean... God please send more people. :D
I'm so looking forward for a break in Indonesia. Though I must say, I had been bothered by the crazy holiday arrangements. My parents are surely going to be upset. I really need to know how to utilize my time. I hate running here and there. I really do. But TL. That's life.
Heard a sharing during focus group about being a disciple. It's really hard to forsake the "I" and let Him be the master of "my" life. Nevertheless, I must pass this test. There are things I wish I don't have to do, or struggle over. But TL! Haha. Just live, and be content, be happy and give thanks lah. What for spend this life and complain all the time?
Aren't there many things to give thanks for?
1) Good parents. (recently heard about a girl whose parents are divorced. her parents are not paying for her education. she really wants a diploma badly but she has to work for money. she has been working since young because her parents don't really provide for her. which led to her truancy at school. sad isn't it.) So are you blessed? You better say yes. 2) Life. (just go to the hospital and you'll agree with me. u'll even give thanks for the fact that you need to take public transport even though it's tiring. or go to the mall, even though there are so many people.) 3) Food. (face it. we don't really know what hunger is! but just think about this. we have enough money to buy whatever food we have. i know of people who has to eat instant noodles often to save money.) 4) By now if you're still not thankful, try to spend one night outside the house and sleep there. then you'll be thankful for a nice bed.
Ok. Enough of my ramblings.. God bless. And stay thankful :)
Just got back from indo.. now starting a new phase in life.. will be teaching in school... and have recently moved in with a fren in our temporary rented place. location is super good.. but now while i am waiting for work to start, there aren't much things to do.. so i am super bored.
but after talking to the retired aunty who's also renting a room in my place. i feel that i have to give thanks. she's just basically watching tv all day.. at least i've got something to look forward to next week. so heehee.. hope everything goes well. Lord, please attach me to a good mentor! hehe...
it's so sad to break out of my comfort zone, but if i dun everything will go rusty. so I need to learn to give thanks for the job that He's given to me.. :)
Hi all. I've been missing from blog for a long long time. I just came back from a grad trip and is resting in Batam right now.
I had been having quite a few nightmares regarding my result. Perhaps because of my not so satisfactory result last semester, I was down with fear. I have countless of nightmares regarding not graduating and having no honours throughout the sem. Sometimes I wake up with tears. Fear was really gripping me. But all these while I've been holding on to His goodness and His faithfulness. Knowing that if I can't do it, God can give me the extraordinary grace. I know I can only jump a few steps from the stairs. But I know my God will run up the stairs to catch me!
Finally my worries have come to an end today, when I checked my result online. Better than I expected. Though it's not a good honours, but I am more than thankful for it. Cos I know I wouldn't have done it on my own. I am totally dependent on Him when I am studying and doing my projects. God always encourage me through sermons, people and His words. How wonderful is God. I can never say that He doesn't exist because He has shown to be so miraculous to me, even when I doubt Him.
I was so excited about the result, I had to call my mom. Because she has been asking her CG members to pray for me. Those aunties are so cute. They have also been praying for me for my Taiwan trip, so that I'll be save from swine flu. God has truly given my mom great sisters in Christ to encourage her along the way... God is great! My mom gave me a gym membership!!! heheh.. Now I can go for my triathlon everyday! After my taiwan trip, I have grown to like cycling more! I wanna continue exercising and don't want my enthusiasm to die off. So thank God for the gift from my mommy.
I have graduated!! Thank God. and thank Him for my parents who have given me parents scholarship to study. :D
Every student has to take temperature before examination and update their contacts in a list, for tracking purposes. Well done NUS! HAHA. And students staying in hall are given free oral thermometer to check temperature everyday. We also have to logon to the website to key in our temperature. One suggestion.. can we be granted A immediately if we cannot take the paper in the exam hall? Haha.
What a role model for us all!! Youtube has disabled embedding for this video but here's the link You gotta check this out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY
there are times when you think i know quite well then there are also times when you are amazed at something greater there are times when you think everything's okay but there are times when you realize it's mediocrity also sometimes you think you got it altogether and one thing would just come to prove you wrong
that's life
re-think re-evaluate re-directing
just need a little grace and mercy to re-live the life I need to live
Now I've heard there was a secret chord That David played, and it pleased the Lord But you don't really care for music, do you? It goes like this The fourth, the fifth The minor fall, the major lift The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah...
Your faith was strong but you needed proof You saw her bathing on the roof Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you She tied you To a kitchen chair She broke your throne, and she cut your hair And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah
Hallelujah...
Baby I have been here before I know this room, I've walked this floor I used to live alone before I knew you. I've seen your flag on the marble arch Love is not a victory march It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah...
There was a time you let me know What's real and going on below But now you never show it to me, do you? And remember when I moved in you The holy dove was moving too And every breath we drew was Hallelujah
Hallelujah...
You say I took the name in vain I don't even know the name But if I did, well really, what's it to you? There's a blaze of light In every word It doesn't matter which you heard The holy or the broken Hallelujah
Hallelujah...
I did my best, it wasn't much I couldn't feel, so I tried to touch I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool you And even though It all went wrong I'll stand before the Lord of Song With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah
1) No matter how "small" you think the society thinks you are, you have to believe and be confident that you have a great call (the cleaner). That confidence can't be bought, can't be taught, but is to be grown in your time with the Lord.
2) It's true everyone is given a chance to know Christ. But not all will be willing to choose the narrow path. It's not a matter of God's calling. It's a matter of whether we wanna hear and do something about it. (And I am a firm believer in this. Very firm)
Today, the media is filled with so many things that are unacceptable, but have made them acceptable over time. You know when you go into internet, ads at the side, waiting for bus, the ads at the bus stops, tv, movies, etc. Sometimes the pictures are just too lusty for the eye. I've been reminded today that in order to fully become a pure vessel, we need to examine our standards again. What is acceptable and what is not.
Desire for pure things only.
Do not be deceived. God is pure, we need to be really pure too. The grace of God is able to help us to change and to make the right adjustments in life. Imagine us as a cup of tainted water, as long as we're willing for God to do something to our cup of water, our lifestyle, what we're pouring into our lives. We need to pour ourselves out to God and He'll help us purify our hearts in the purest state. But first, we need to make a decision.. We must be willing to filter. It's hard to do in this "modern" society. However, He can fill us with His eternal joy, in exchange for the temporal things. Soap operas too hard to lose? Movies? What we read/ watch? Come to God and He can enable us. There's a price to pay to pursue a godly pure life.
